Is it Christmas?
I was telling my friend Alun about something that happened to me last weekend and I realised I might as well share it with you people too.
So, I go into this department store and they were playing Christmas songs. Just to put this into some sort of perspective, it’s last Sunday – October 28th – and they’re playing bloody Christmas music.
It took every ounce of my strength not to grab the nearest salesperson and shake them vigorously by the shoulders, shouting “Is it Christmas? Is it? IS IT!? NO! No it bloody isn’t! It isn’t even bloody Halloween yet, you bastards!”.
In retrospect that may have been a little harsh, so I’m glad I kept my usual cool exterior.
My experience in the department store, like a visit from the Ghost of Christmas past, left me with somewhat of a crisis, questioning my harsh attitude and what might lie ahead in the Christmases to come. By morning I had renewed vigor and was alive with the Christmas spirit. I flung open to window of my apartment and shouted down to a small street urchin, “You boy! What day is this?”. He replied, in an appropriately jolly manner, “Today sir? Why it’s the 29th of October!”, before adding a heart felt “Merry Christmas sir!”.
ok, so that didn’t actually happen. My windows are locked and I lost the key about 3 months ago. Still, if I was able to open them, that’s how I imagine the whole scene would play out.
Anyhow, as Halloween has now safely passed us by, I’ve decided it’s time to fully embrace the (now even longer) “Christmas season”. I’m embracing it so much so that, from today onwards, I shall start saying “Merry Christmas” to every salesperson I see in town. And then, when they look back at me in utter bemusement, I’ll shout at them “See! SEE!”.
Or maybe I’ll just walk off and remain smugly quiet, I haven’t quiet decided yet.