Lloydie’s Blog

I was discussing personality profiles with Carolyn the other day. I remember taking one as a kid at school, the whole class took them. Once we’d taken them, we all got to read each others and say whether or not we thought they were accurate. Apart from testing the correctness of your results, it was also pretty interesting to find out what everyone else thought about you. I was voted “most laid-back”. I remember thinking this was kinda weird at the time, as we didn’t actually get to vote about anyone else, just me. Was my teacher was trying to tell me something? I don’t know. It’s lucky I’m so laid-back, otherwise I could have gotten seriously paranoid.

After our little discussion, Carolyn (being ever resourceful) goes and finds this website where you can take the tests. And so, of course, I did.

It’s a series of multiple choice questions (72 to be exact) that were developed by some people called Myers and Briggs (there’s also thing Jung guy that it’s kinda based on). It has some pretty serious psychological backing, it’s not just one of those “tell me your favourite colour or you’ll have bad luck for 5 years” things.

Anyway, as I was saying, I took the test. Apparently I’m an ENFP. So what the hell is an ENFP and, more importantly, why the hell do you care?

So it works like this. You take the test and then you get given your “personality type”. There are 16 of them, and everyone is one (and only one). Each one has a rubbish acronym that doesn’t make much sense (i.e. ENFP). They also have more poetic names, which vary depending one where you look. For example, on one site I’m in a group called “The Inspirers”. On another I’m “The Advocate”, and on yet another I’m “The Visionary”. I’m sticking with that one until I find a site where it’s calling me “The Most Awesomest Future Ruler of the Free People”.

Once you’ve got your acronym you can them look up the profile of your type, e.g. what it all actually means. This is where it gets really interesting. This site, for example, contains information on your profile, career choices, personality and relationships, you name it. And the weird thing is, it’s all scarily accurate. Like “bugger me, have they been following me for weeks or something?” accurate. I mean, it’s lucky I’m so laid-back, otherwise I could have gotten seriously paranoid.

There was an article in the Metro today about some scientists who have managed to breed mice that have no fear. Somehow these crazy science types have isolated the part of the mouse that senses fear, and then gone and removed it (presumably just for fun). Apparently the fearless mice then proceed to wander up to nearby cats and (possibly) taunt them, in Speedy Gonzalez kind of way. Sadly, these lab mice are *not* blessed with Se�or Gonzalez’s super speed, and are presumably promptly eaten by said feline.

Anyway, this kinda got me wondering. What if Brian came from such a lab? I mean, I’m not saying he’s fearless or anything. He hid behind the sofa for the entirety of this weeks Heroes episode (to be fair, that Sylar bloke is one scary son-of-a-bitch). What I’m saying is, what if he’d been part of some evil (or, for arguments sake, non-evil) science lab experiment?

To satisfy my curiosity (and make sure I’m not living with some evil super-mouse), I’m going to start testing Brian’s abilities, just in-case he’s got some amazing power I have yet to discover (other than being able to disappear for weeks on end). Also, for the benefit of the scientific community/eminent historians/bored people who read my blog, I shall be recording my findings here. That is, of course, unless Brian’s super ability is some sort of mind control thing. If it is, we’re all screwed.

I was telling my friend Alun about something that happened to me last weekend and I realised I might as well share it with you people too.

So, I go into this department store and they were playing Christmas songs. Just to put this into some sort of perspective, it’s last Sunday - October 28th - and they’re playing bloody Christmas music.

It took every ounce of my strength not to grab the nearest salesperson and shake them vigorously by the shoulders, shouting “Is it Christmas? Is it? IS IT!? NO! No it bloody isn’t! It isn’t even bloody Halloween yet, you bastards!”.

In retrospect that may have been a little harsh, so I’m glad I kept my usual cool exterior.

My experience in the department store, like a visit from the Ghost of Christmas past, left me with somewhat of a crisis, questioning my harsh attitude and what might lie ahead in the Christmases to come. By morning I had renewed vigor and was alive with the Christmas spirit. I flung open to window of my apartment and shouted down to a small street urchin, “You boy! What day is this?”. He replied, in an appropriately jolly manner, “Today sir? Why it’s the 29th of October!”, before adding a heart felt “Merry Christmas sir!”.

ok, so that didn’t actually happen. My windows are locked and I lost the key about 3 months ago. Still, if I was able to open them, that’s how I imagine the whole scene would play out.

Anyhow, as Halloween has now safely passed us by, I’ve decided it’s time to fully embrace the (now even longer) “Christmas season”. I’m embracing it so much so that, from today onwards, I shall start saying “Merry Christmas” to every salesperson I see in town. And then, when they look back at me in utter bemusement, I’ll shout at them “See! SEE!”.

Or maybe I’ll just walk off and remain smugly quiet, I haven’t quiet decided yet.