Trick or treat?
Twice this weekend I have been approached by little kids, around 5-7 years old, wearing cheap plastics masks and asking me for cash. I’m sorry, but since when did Halloween start 2 weeks early and involve down-right begging?
I may be a bit old for trick-or-treating now days, but I’m still pretty sure the rules of engagement haven’t changed. Correct me if I’m wrong but I thought it went like this:
a) get dressed up for Halloween
Wearing your normal clothes and a 99p mask from the joke shop does not constitute a costume. If you come up to me, like one girl did, failing to even wear a mask, expect a frosty response. We asked her where her costume was and, as if it was a perfectly acceptable trick-or-treat strategy, she replied “it’s in my bag”. Yeah? So is my money, now piss off.
b) go trick or treating for sweets
In a moment of undeserving charity, my sister gave one small girl a sweet from her handbag. The girl removed the sweet from her McHallowee n “collection cup” and looked at it as if we’d just wrapped up a turd and asked her to eat it.
Kids used to settle for sweets. Now it appears that they just want cold, hard cash. You have to wonder if there is some Dickensian mastermind behind all this, sending hordes of children out into the night to lighten the purses of the populace.
c) go from door to door, not pub to pub
What happened to the image of children walking from door to door, down pleasant tree-lined streets (or other such clich�d locations from the Americana of my youth)? Apparently it is gone, replaced by gangs of children roaming from pub to pub at 11 o’clock at night. Children all under the age of 10 by the way. Although I didn’t see their parents, I’m assuming they were stood outside the pub, smoking a fag and picking the next target for their Halloween begging squad.
d) do all of that actually on Halloween
Halloween is on October 31st. That’s at the end of the month, not now. Sadly it’s on a Wednesday this year, which I’m guessing will make trick-or-treating more difficult for the children of today, as most people will be tucked up at home and not down the pub with a pocket full of cash.